"One of you lazy-asses better draw me!"
|The Obi Man|
|Birth Date||First of The Year (by Skrillex), 1901 (by Phoenix)|
|Family||None. Dey all dead.|
|Status||Alive? Never changed|
|Eye Color||Wait hold up. *looks in the mirror* A light shade of grey|
|Hair Color||Hold up. *looks in the mirror* A slightly darker shade of grey|
|Height||Ummm...Hm...I think I'm round about Akami's height.|
|Age||123. It's like saying your ABCs|
|Weight||Man, personal much?|
|Health||Chokin' up blood here and there, but other than that I'm all good.|
|Affiliation||THE PARTAAAAYYYY!!!! WHHHHOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!|
|Weapons||Ma' dukes and a knife and whatever comes out my pockets|
|Base of Operations||Why you askin' all dem' questions?|
|Quests||Retired. Don't need to do not'n|
|Previous Occupation(s)||A Sexy Kick-Ass Soldier|
|Current Occupation||Father of 100,000. Can't get any cheaper than that.|
|Abilities||Survive brain loss|
|Fighting Style||Obi-Chi, Tae-Wan-Obi,|
|Partner||I had a brother but...*sniff* He gone...|
|Team||Frontliners (or ASTR if we crossed-over with RWBY.)|
|Relatives||Got none! Dey all dead!|
Hey all you people! That lazy-ass Kameron finally made my page! Now I'm gonna tell you aaaalll about your favorite man: Barack Obama....Oh wait...He dead...Well I'll just go to the next best thing: MEEEEE!!!
How I Look and How I Act Edit
Well if I could sum myself up in one word. It would be: Sexy. I mean who doesn't like a man with shady tan skin, covered with war scars over his body lika boss, and manages to rock wearing torn military green shorts. Just strutin' his stuff 25/8.
When I come to the way I act. i believe I act rather civilized. Or atleast act like I have some common sense other than the rest of the fools down here. *pours 'milk' in a ceral box and he proceeds to eat out of the box* I think I'm well profound in the ways of being a gentleman. TOREM! GET DA FUCK IN HERE!
Torem: *comes through the door* What dammit?!
Don't forget, you need to get me some more lotion for my daily ass rub.
Torem: Fine...*prepares to turn and leave*
Oh also, I need you to rub it for me this time.
Yea, my backside has been irritable lately and only your soft hands can make it atleast bit better. *eats more of his cereal*
Torem: I don't rub your ass, Obi!
You will suck my fucking dick if I tell you to! You will suck my fucking dick! And I don't mind forcing you! I can get off on it more that way!
Torem: WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!
EVERYTHIIIIIING!!! So you either lotion my ass or you suck my Obone!
Torem: *gives him a defeated look* Fine...*leaves the room and closes the door*
What did I say? No respect at all. *eats more cereal* Ain't that right, Cap'n?
People I Know Edit
My '1st' kid and my joy. I come off exceptionally leaniant towards her, but that doesn't mean she still can't get beat for screwin' up. She's been with me the longer and has helped me shape the sewers of this continent into the fine refuge we all know today as The Junkyosha Party. She knows how I do things so I let her take up with the business while I hang back here and get high off sunshine. Other words, great girl. If she had died, I'd be ballin' lika man-child
Segura is hard-head and will never learn anything unless you beat the mess out of him! He rubs off on my in a bad way and we hardly communicate because the moment he opens his mouth, I'm force feeding him a nice, crisp knuckle sandwich of 'Shut Your Fucking Mouth'! I know he means well for The Party but he's just so uptight, just like Torey's butthole
Torem: WHAT THE HELL, OBI!!!
Torem, I swear to good Lord above, if you do not shut your face, I'm going to make your butthole 6 inches wider! Geez....Damn kids. Anyway Segs is all like 'Uggghh, I don't trust people.' and I'm like 'Well I don't trust you, that's why I let Akami fuck up your face.' So in other words, annoying kid. Reminds me of someone else just like him.
Eh, she's ok. Aside from being a big whiner, she's also a big help. She's my beck and call for whenever I need something. HEY TOREM!
MAKE ME A SANDWICH!
AND HALF IT VERTICALLY THIS TIME! Chick acts like she never cut a sandwich before. She sure makes my life alot easier and whether she knows it or not, she makes my life alot easier. When she get's back I'll giver her a present: A poster of me posing in a man-kini. Heheh, She's gonna love. Can't wait to capture a picture of her nose-bleeding.
Ma' favorite son, Rev is the only one here who gets me, aside from his occasional stupidity, he reminds me alot of myself. Charismatic, athletic (more or less), and sexy. Though I do tend to beat up on him alot more than anyone else, but it's a form of me showing my love, aswell as punishing him for something he probably did or will do that was wrong. Either way, love the boy. Be a lonely world without him
What do you really want me to say about her? I don't even know she's here most of the time. So in other words, she's irrelevant. She's just...here. No rhyme or reason, just....here. I blame Kameron. YOU LAZY ASS!!! Why you make char. dat serve no purpose? Time wasteeer!
That whiny little prick, who done brought all this drama to my place. I'm still riding on that too. I guess I can say is, he isn't half bad a guy, but he sort of losses sight of what it really means to be a leader. Grant it, leaders do that, but the reason why he lost himself was over a girl. That's the part that gets me. A girl shouldn't define who you are. You take that responsibility, not here. Besides, you should've...My apologies, getting abit off topic. Not half bad, needs work, and needs to now his place here while he's under my roof...or building...Whichever works.
Naomi (Fox Girl) Edit
Out any good thing that blonde prick done brought along, she's absolutely the best. She's just so adorable and she has this sort of strength within her, but I notice there's some self doubt in there and I don't do that negative bullshit. No one does around here. Sure her life sucked back then boo-hoo, but so does everyone elses and look at how their doing. She can do the same thing if she just let's go and let God. Got that from Kirk Franklin.
Fat Dragon Lady Edit
I know most of you are wondering 'Why do I strongly dislike the Dragon Lady?' Well it's mostly because where she stands with the good doctor. To me, it's like Naruhina. She likes the dude because she helped her out. The only difference is, she isn't a creepy-ass stalker that hides behind trees. But she does mistake admiration for the dude as love. Chick, you've only known him for about a week or so. Love takes time! Sure you can be very grateful the dude help you split, but you don't have to fall puddy into his hands! Cause grant it, this mother fucker is only bringing out the worst in you! And then that brings out the very worst in me! All I see in you is a short-tempered pet to the glass-wearing fool! Every time we bark at each other, it's because of him! You act like 3-grader who gets upset because someone says something about your mom! You don't even tell him to back off when clearly he's invading someone elses home! No you just follow along with it! He may have had good intentions, but I don't know him! If I don't know him, he does not have permission to be in my house! You are just a toy! I want to believe that you're more than that, but until you actually evaluate your feelings for this fool, I can't think otherwise!
Extension Eyes Edit
Mother fucker! This guys is the epitome of douchebag! He thinks he can just show up wheneeever he wants just because he knows people here! This is my house, ok? Unless you know me, you cannot come into my house! I don't care if you don't mean any harm, you cannot come into my house whenever want just so you can see your girlfriend! He just blatantly disregards that he is disrespecting said host! Your behavior is despicable! I never felt this what about ANYONE except youall because of how much of a dick you really are! But the reason they don't see it is because I'm Obi! He's crazy and wears torn shorts, so obviously he's the dick! One of these days...And the thing is I don't wanna fight with your girlfriend, but whenever it comes to you it's just......IMPOSSIBLE! Just impossible! Fuck you and all your noise! Impossible! Damn...
That Knife Chick Edit
Single-handedly the 2nd best thing to happen to me since Akami. She's everything I ever wanted! She listens to me and she gets it done the right way...*sniff* It brings me joy knowing that someone can listen to me with having to say I'm crazy...