A soliloquy from one of the few who can remember all of their previous incarnations.
The Past and PresentEdit
My story is... Complicated. It's difficult to explain knowing everything you are going to do years ahead of time. It's more difficult to explain how you know how you'll die based on your choices. I've seen the same events over and over again, to the point where I've memorized every action like a game of chess with no victor. Sometimes I wonder if this is karma or some form of sick amusement higher beings make to pass the time. Maybe it's a punishment for not preventing a certain person's death or for being too late to stop the corruption of another. Still, those events have been set in stone and, unless I decide to ruin the lives of thousands for my own personal gain, there is no way to prevent them from happening.
Recently, I've been contemplating destroying this world, not the one I am a sovereign over, but the one from which strife stems. It's a rather tantalizing proposal, but I don't think that I'll get around to doing it for a long time if I do. Still, my care for the worlds is dwindling and slowly becoming nonexistent- especially with the visitors I often get, people wanting to learn my knowledge for personal gain rather than the good of the people they represent.
That's it. I've decided that I'll accept his proposal. Soon I'll disappear from this place and take on the mantle of my former lord once this world collapses. I'll likely have to face the Emperor once again, but I do not care much for that. With that taken care of, all I need is to attain peace of mind and I will be fully content with my new position. Strangely, I find myself missing this world and what few ties I have to it. I wonder if this is the last strand of who I used to be pulling me back to my home. The attempt is in vain, but for the first time in a long I've felt the the faint tug of a tear. This is rather surprising, I'd thought myself devoid of all pointless emotions.
The time has come and passed. Everything occurred in the briefest of instants and the aftermath was known long after the event. I am now what my lord was, yet I am not. I am now one of two parts and without hindrance. I do not feel sad, nor do I regret my choice- That can be said for both sides of me. This aspect of duality is somewhat confusing, but I am adapting to it slowly. Sometimes our visions merge, other times our words carry over to the other side. To be honest, it is mildly irritating, but to each his own. I now understand my forefathers and their message about time wearing away at the sturdiest of materials, I've long forgotten my name and reason for being. The stars say that I'll remember everything when the time is right, but that does not ease my feelings of doubt by much... Ah, doubt, something ill befitting my current position. It seems I still have much to learn. On that note, it appears that I can laugh at my own shortcomings once more.
My new position is wholly monotonous. People request and demand aid, I give them it. People lack gratitude and demand things in return for nothing, I give them nothing. It is somewhat tedious to deal with, but I recall having a far more tedious position in the past. I really shouldn't gripe, I have things to do compared to before. It seems that this position really isn't suiting for me, but I can find some form of enjoyment in that. I assume that makes me odd, but I've never cared for that.